My review of Bone: Tall Tales

John was wrong. This is the best book yet! It's about BIG JOHNSON BONE. YEAH! And tales, but mostly tales about Big Johnson Bone.

There's this big queen of the rat creatures. Spooooooky.

There is a tale about how the rat creatures stopped having beautiful long tails. Big Johnson Bone, he used them as handles and swung them around. And at the end of the book, the queen of the rat creatures cut off all of the rat creatures' tails. Just because of that.

I think that was probably a good idea, because they have less weaknesses.

My favourite part of the book was when they got their tails cut off. My least favourite was when Big Johnson Bone got eaten by Tyson. Tyson is the BIG BIG BIG BIG rat creature.

How I got Axis and Allies!

I got Axis and Allies! It's a board game. It's a lot like Risk, which is another board game. Except there is planes and boats. It is now my favourite game. The bad guys were called Axis and the good guys were called Allies.

Japan bombed the United States. They bombed Hawaii. It was one of the biggest deals there is. Because the United States was not in the war at all! They were just there! They had all of their boats and everything standing in Pearl Harbour. And Japan sent like 1000 boats and everything and tried to take over it but they couldn't.

Germany bombed France and took it right over. And they grabbed a lot of the people and put them in camps. Germany was like sooooo bad, like evil. They just killed people for no reason because they didn't like them.

England was really big in the war. And the United States took back France and gave it back to them! And nobody bombed Canada.

And there was an atomic bomb. The United States dropped it on Japan because they tried to attack Hawaii.

Elections

My mom told me how the elections work in America. She said that it was Barack Obama and Joe Biden versus John McCain and Sarah Palin. It is like the final two. And you get to vote for the president and the vice president and it is like a team.

And I am really glad at how it went. Because I do not want Sarah Palin to be the vice president. Oh my gosh. She would probably turn Wal-Mart upside down and turn the whole town animatronic. My mom says she is nobody. That is good. I would not even want to visit if she was in charge.

Hi Uncle Matt,

The masks are awesome, too. But I didn't have enough time to squish them into my video. I got the idea from looking at this video of Sarah Palin. She was talking, and I thought GEEZ SARAH PALIN TALKS TOO MUCH. And, like, whose side is she on?!

I really like making jokes

Here's the real one:

My bus got in a car accident!

My bus got into a car accident! It happened in the morning. So at first, there was this commercial on the radio. And it was the perfect time for a special effect, like a CRASH! And then I heard a screeching noise. And KA-TUNK! I went flying into the front of the seat and then I went flying back.

And I was like, "Cool. That's a cool effect!"

And then I saw that everybody was looking back. So I looked back and I saw a truck. The front of the truck was all smashed. It was all crushed.

And then we had to go to another bus. And when I came out of the bus and looked at the truck, there was pieces on the ground of the truck. It was creepy but not creepy. It was the first time I was ever in a car accident. And when we left to the bus, everyone was talking about it. They were just telling their friends, "WE WERE IN A CAR ACCIDENT!" But my friends weren't really amazed.

Annie

This is my review. And it's better than Kyle's.

There were some things that I really liked. I liked the funny parts, like "EEEEEAASY STREEEEET". And I knew the girl who was in that. (Hi, Jacqueline, BTW!) I liked the president. He was funny. I wonder if he was really in a wheelchair. I doubt it. It was probably just part of his costume, like a prop.

And there were some things that I did NOT like. Like some of the songs. SOME of the songs. I did not like the one about the hard-knock life. I hated that. Plus, now my parents are always saying that I should have a hard-knock life and clean the floors like an orphan. Hey Kyle, why don't YOU clean the floors?

And I knew other people in the play, too. Like Nyree and the lady who was the orphanage owner. She's cool.